The TrueTalk Blog: Ray Webb, My Dear Friend

Six weeks ago, I lost a friend of over 30 years. Ray Webb. Ray was a very important person in my life...he changed my life in important ways. Ray was part of a rare breed: selfless public servant. Last weekend, my old friend Albie Webb, Ray's wife, asked me to be a part of a memorial service for Ray in the lovely rolling hills of Washington County, Pennsylvania. She asked me to say a few words about Ray. After thinking about it for a week, I decided to post those words here, in hope that others might find a small measure of inspiration from Ray's life.

Good morning.

Albie, Ray, Sue, Beth, thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to say a few words today.

I have a question I’d like you all to think about:

Have you ever known anyone like Ray Webb?

Have you ever known anyone as dedicated to the well-being of our fellow human beings as Ray Webb?

Have you ever known anyone as tenacious and tireless at working for a cause as Ray Webb?

Anyone who’s touched as many lives?

Have you ever known anyone who loved gadgets as much as Ray Webb?

I didn’t think so.

Ray Webb was unique.

I met Ray on a bright September afternoon in 1972 when he interviewed me for a job at Allegheny East, in an office he shared with his right-hand, his trusted advisor, Don Nicolson.

I remember thinking at the time that, for being the Executive Director, this was a pretty unpretentious guy.

I guess, sometimes, first impressions can be spot on.

Because Ray didn’t think he was important…he thought his work was important. Because, Ray was a man on a mission: helping others.

And, as was clear to anyone who knew him, Ray was always working on that mission.

He was always working to try to find more ways…better ways…to help people in need.

He was always working to convince, cajole or even…at times…coerce the people who controlled the purse strings to do more for the less fortunate among us.
We didn’t really have a name for what Ray was doing back then, but nowadays we do: it’s called, “speaking truth to power.” Speaking in that way, with integrity, is what gave Ray his special credibility.

You could count on Ray Webb to tell you the truth.

You could count on him to tell the people who made the rules just what those rules should be if they really wanted others to have a chance at a better life.

That’s because “social work” wasn’t a profession for Ray, it was a way of being.
For him, social work was rooted in a deep belief in the intrinsic value of our fellow human beings. For Ray, doing social work was the highest calling.

After I left Allegheny East, and the mental health system, I went on to become a management consultant. For the last twenty years, I’ve been studying, thinking about, and talking about leadership.

And throughout all that time, and all my work with leaders, my thoughts have always come back to Ray.

Why?

Because Ray Webb powerfully embodied some of the most important characteristics for any leader.

First and foremost, Ray was a visionary; an “idea man.” He was constantly looking for new, innovative ways to redesign what he always called, “the system.” In Ray’s vision, there was always more that could be done.

Second, leadership was a team sport for Ray. He counted on the people he worked with…he made us all feel important…he made us all believe that we were capable of doing great things. And we were all better at what we did because of Ray’s leadership.

Third, not only was Ray passionate about helping others, but he created an infectious atmosphere around him that made it impossible for others not to be passionate, too.

None of us ever wanted to let him down. Right? That was what made working at Allegheny East such a special…and, for me, life-changing…experience.

For many of us, it was the only time in our lives when we were part of a great team, dedicated to an important cause, led by a great leader. I don’t need to tell you that this is not something that everyone is lucky enough to experience.

Finally, like all great leaders…and I can’t think of a better way to say it: Ray Webb had his head on straight.

Even though Ray worked all the time, he certainly wasn’t all about work.

He loved his family a great deal. He was very, very proud of you all.

He had a great sense of humor…what a terrific laugh, huh?...and loved nothing better than to hear those of us who knew him best lampoon him. We all know that Ray gave lots of speeches. Remember his big opening lines?

“1963. It was the best of times…it was the worst of times…”

Many of us here today were lovingly merciless with him on that one…and Ray was always the one laughing the loudest!

Lots of us spent countless hours laughing with Ray as we watched motionless fishing bobbers floating in some pond, or lake somewhere…or sitting under an umbrella on the sand at his beloved Myrtle Beach…all the while scheming about new ways to squeeze a few more dollars out of the state or the county.

But, after all this, Ray Webb was my friend. After I left Pittsburgh, we’d talk every month or so…always picking right up where we’d left off the last time.

I’d call…Albie would answer…Albie always answers…we’d chat a bit, and then she’d call out in that distinctive Western Pennsylvania way of hers, “Ray…it’s Tom…”

And I know I’m really gonna miss what would come next: my friend, picking up the phone with that great laugh in his voice, saying, “Hey, what’s happening, Tommy boy?”

We’re all gonna miss you, Ray.

Thanks for everything.

Tags: Ray Webb